POST-OSCAR MUSINGS

The Morning After . . .

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  A few random reflections on the 82nd Annual Academy Awards show . . .
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  Neil Patrick Harris, you were right. What were you doing there?
  



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  Co-hosts Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin – the funniest comedy team since Leopold and Loeb. The only scintilla of spontaneous wit came with Martin’s ad lib, “I wrote that guy’s speech.” Baldwin & Martin have zero chemistry together – which, in Hollywood, pretty much guarantees a sequel.
  




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  Whoever that woman was who took the Oscar for Best Costume Design – her 3rd Oscar win – went from regal to pain-in-the-ass conceit in the time it took her to deign to rise from her seat (an eternity) and alight to the stage. Once there, her ungracious and patronizing remarks nearly earned her boos from the audience – and when you nearly get booed by the most condescending crowd in show biz, you must be doing something right.
  




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  ‘Avatar’ – aka James Cameron’s ego - got pretty much stiffed, much to my satisfaction. It did take several technical awards, justifiably. Yes, it was one giant strip mall of eye candy, no question. But as far as being a good or even remotely original movie, ‘Avatar’ was more bloated than an Imax screen. Cameron has a fatal habit of recycling clichés and convincing himself that he created them.
  




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  ‘The Hurt Locker’ emerged the night’s big winner – Best Picture, Best Direction, Best Editing, Best Sound – and deserved all the accolades. It was gratifying to see the Academy reward substance over . . well, ‘Avatar.’ And when Katherine Bigelow was announced as Best Director – over her ex-husband, James Cameron, who was seated directly behind her – did I see what I thought I saw? Total and complete non-acknowledgement? Cameron did not so much as touch her shoulder, and she certainly ignored him in her (gracious) acceptance speech. The camera did reveal him shaking his head – whether in admiration, surprise or incredulousness is open to interpretation. The chill factor was bigger than the iceberg in Cameron’s ‘Titanic’.
  




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  And speaking of ‘chill factor’, what was up with George Clooney? Is he the new Jack Nicholson, destined to be saluted and kidded as the reigning celebrity deity by the (co) hosts and fawning female co-stars? If so, he should lighten up. He was so taciturn he nearly scowled with contempt at the camera. And speaking of Jack Nicholson, did anyone miss him?
  




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  Kudos to the Academy for selecting ‘The Cove’ as Best Documentary – and more so for showing a visceral, graphic and explicit clip during the nominations, exposing the film and the issue to millions of viewers who would otherwise be disinclined to see such upsetting footage. Boos, however, too ABC censors, who quickly cut away from a ballsy bit of guerilla activism on the part of the filmmakers, who attempted to (clumsily) unfurl a banner during their acceptance speech.
  




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  The ‘Salute to Horror Films’ segment was best omitted but wasn’t. Poorly inserted, unimaginatively executed . . . what did it have to do with anything?
  




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  Ashton Kutcher, comb your damn hair.
  




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  Oprah Winfrey . .God, don’t get me started. You have turned clandestine self-promotion into an art. Precious. Right.
  




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  Jeff Bridges’ nod for Best Actor was well-deserved – for several other roles he has played over the years. His acceptance speech was the most delightful of the evening, tho . . . his acknowledgement of family was heartfelt and uplifting.
  




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  Sandra Bullock, you were right. “ . . or did I just wear y’all down?” Apparently.